challenges after challenges i face in werlds. hatred anger sadness disappointment are piling up in my life. is there not any moment of happiness.. this is where negativity roams; my life. everyday i cursed myself when i wake up. why do i even have to wake up. why not wake up to see that im jus a soul. reaching out towards God's hands. now, i dun hope fer a better life. i dun tell myself that my pathetic life can be betta. i dun pray to be luved. coz when i hope ill be disappointed. when tell myself things will be betta, it never. when i prayed to be luv, nth ever happen. the mre i pray fer luv, the mre i feel that im not.. well. nobody will know this feeling. not even my parent. i dunno wat they are feeling but whenever im sick or disappointed, they jus simply dun care. if a person so close to me doesnt even care, why shld i even. maybe i shld jus run away. run away frm this hse. jus pack my thing and go jus lik that. or maybe... jus maybe... i should jus run away frm this whole werld.. jump down... hang... throw myself in a river... or jus run a secluded area and leave myslef to die. i dun care wat im doin to my body. its a weakness. my body will hurt but my soul will not. my body dies but my soul will not. my soul will jus have to wait till judgement day. how i wish... but admit it fikri. u r a bloody coward hu hide in the shadows of ur werds. i cant even do wat im saying. i can even step out of this hse. i cant behind do the simpliest thing lik slash my wrist. but if im will be able to do it... n if im gone... or if god jus doesnt wanna me to feel this way animre... dont even shed a single tear. shut ur mouth and do not moan my death. coz im betta gone. gone; i will make life betta fer all. my frens, u will not have to suffer becoz of my insensitivity. u will not have to worry bout me. u dun have to suffer the same of me luving u. u dun have to suffer aniting. so be happy tht im gone. smile upon my grave and say iLL nevr see u again thank god...
